How to Answer eHarmony Prompts (Especially for Women Dating Over 50)

If you’ve dipped your toe into the modern world of dating apps, you’ve probably noticed they all have one thing in common — you have to work them if you want them to work for you.

Today, I want to highlight what I've learned as a dating coach about the classic dating site, eHarmony. It's known for its focus on meaningful connections, as demonstrated by its lengthy compatibility quiz. The carefully curated eHarmony questionnaire can actually help you attract better matches — but ONLY if you know how to answer them.

Most women over 50 aren’t on the sites for entertainment purposes. You want a real match, something that leads to serious relationships, and you're ready to put in the work getting your profile up to speed. That's where I come in.

Here's the hopeful news: eHarmony’s questions in particular can help filter for men who share your core values and communication style — if you answer them correctly.

General Tips for Answering eHarmony Prompts

✅ Plan Your Prompts in Advance.
You can find out what the prompts are these days with a little research and write your answers in advance. Once you’re on a new dating site like eHarmony, they’re going to rush you to buy a premium membership. Take your time and don’t succumb to pressure.

✅ Weave in Your 3H Criteria.
Don’t just answer the prompts literally. Instead, decide the ten things you want a potential partner to know about your head, heart, and hoo-ha criteria and choose prompts that let you express those truths naturally.

✅ Allude to Your Potential Liabilities (Lightly).
You can eliminate people who won’t fit your lifestyle — gently and early. Mention the stuff that matters to you (like the dog who sleeps in your bed or your politics) so the compatibility score does its job before you waste your mascara.

✅ Avoid Clichés and Go Specific. 
Specificity signals authenticity. It helps attract like-minded individuals who can picture life with you. Laying out the details of what you like helps eliminate people who can't relate and gives conversation starters to those who can.

✅ Keep It Short and Honest.
You don’t need to answer every prompt. But use every prompt to reveal 1 or 2 new things about you or what you are looking for.  A few sharp, specific sentences are easier for new users (and potential 
matches) to digest than long essays.

✅ Refresh Often.
Did you travel recently? Learn to make sushi? Add it! Updating your profile and pictures boosts user engagement and tells eHarmony’s algorithm you’re an active, interesting human being.

Example: A 62-Year-Old Woman Writing Her eHarmony Profile

So let’s say you are a 62-year-old woman looking for a long-term committed partner, and you decide the top 10 things you want to make sure come across in your profile are:

1. You are independent, still working part-time and loving it, and are looking for a true partner to share nights and weekends and adventures.

2. You love your dog, Rufus, and he sleeps in your bed

3. You really love traveling alone and with friends, and you do it a lot, but you’d rather do it with a romantic partner

4. You’re accustomed to a certain lifestyle

5. You really value kindness and open communication

6. You’re 5’11, so if men have a height issue, they need to know this

7. You’re pretty definitive about your politics, so if you’re not even close on those issues, it might be a problem

8. You are an amazing cook and gardener

9. You still spend a lot of time with your kids and your 1 grandkid, who is a complete and utter joy and cracks you up

10. You’re more of a homebody than a partier, but you can enjoy both.

Here’s how you could work these items into the eHarmony profile prompts:

1. The first thing people notice about me…
   Probably that I’m tall — 5’11” — and usually smiling. I love people and good conversation, so I rarely meet a stranger. Rufus (my loyal dog and nightly bed companion) often steals the show, though.

2. A perfect day for me…
   Starts slow with coffee, Rufus at my feet, and maybe a little gardening before I head out for a walk or a trip to the farmers' market. Later, a great dinner I’ve cooked and shared with someone who makes me laugh. Add music, good conversation, and I’m content.

3. An odd habit of mine…
   I talk to my plants as if they’re people and tell my dog he’s the best man in my life (so far). Neither has disagreed with me yet.

4. The most important thing I’m looking for in a person is…
   Kindness and communication. Someone who’s comfortable being real — honest, curious, and willing to talk about the stuff that matters to being happy. A sense of humor and a steady heart are pretty great, too.

5. I typically spend my leisure time…
   Traveling (sometimes solo, sometimes with friends), cooking, tending my garden, or spending time with my grown kids and my hilarious 4-year-old grandson (ask me about the crazy thing he said to me recently). I also love quiet weekends at home — currently seeking a partner to share them with.

6. The four things my friends say I am...
   Independent, generous, loyal, and very funny, once you get to know me. They also say Rufus is spoiled — they’re not wrong.

7. What I am most passionate about…
   Living a life that feels full and grounded — good food, human connection, laughter, nature, and staying engaged in politics. Shared values matter to me, so we'd better discuss this upfront.

8. A little more about me…
   I’m 62 and still working part-time in a career I love. I’m not looking for someone to take care of me — I’m looking for a partner to share the fun and adventure: travel the world, slow Sundays, discovering new restaurants, or just staying in and playing games, cooking together (though you oughtta let me lead, because I'm good at it), and talking politics.

9. My ideal first date…
   Something easy and low-pressure — a walk, a glass of wine, or dinner where we can hear each other talk. I want to get to know you.

10. Something you should know about me…
    Rufus sleeps in the bed, politics matter to me, and I’m not into pretending otherwise. I’m warm, loyal, and love life — and I’m hoping to find someone who feels the same.

See how so much can be communicated in just a few short sentences? And see how many opportunities there are here for conversation starters and one direct prompt to ask a question? If you add 4-6 great, well-lit pics of you smiling, you'll have a striking profile that depicts you (and what you want) honestly, succinctly, and clearly. And that's how you win with dating sites.

Coaching:

Remember, your dating profile isn’t about proving your worth — it’s about clearly signaling who you are and what kind of partnership you’re ready for.  Be unique, be witty, be thorough, be you, and let eHarmony’s compatibility matching system do the rest.

Not sure if you are ready to date like you mean it?

Watch my free webinar, “3 Secrets to Finding and Maintaining Healthy Love Without Repeated Disappointments,” at lauriegerber.com/webinar.

You’ll learn how to use my 3H Method to attract real love — online or off.

FAQs About Answering eHarmony Prompts

1. What’s the easiest way to get better matches on eHarmony?

Take time with the compatibility quiz and answer prompts thoughtfully. The algorithm uses your personality profile and core values to match you with compatible singles-- not just people who swiped right.

2. Does paying for a premium membership really help?

A premium membership offers messaging, full profiles, and better visibility with new members. Only think of investing in your online dating experience in this way if you are serious and you've optimized your profile(link to blog)  already. 

3. How detailed should my eHarmony profile be?

Extremely detailed — that’s what sets eHarmony apart from simpler swiping apps. A very detailed profile and thoughtful responses give the system more to work with and attract potential partners who want something real.

4. How can I make sure I get the best results on eHarmony?

Keep your photos recent, use high-quality photos, answer prompts in your natural voice, and log in regularly. eHarmony rewards active users and thoughtful responses with higher visibility.

5. Is eHarmony good for people dating over 50?

Yes — it’s one of the best senior dating sites because it emphasizes serious relationships and deeper compatibility. Many women in midlife love that it helps them find real matches based on substance, not just looks.

Love,