Top 3 Third Date Mistakes To Avoid
The 3rd date is a significant milestone, it assumes you are really interested in each other and attracted– but there are still some very important things to get clear on before you can proceed further.
WARNING: Once you have 4 or more dates with a person you unconsciously become “invested” even if the person is not a match..
That’s why Date 3 is pivotal and the one that should be your inflection point where you decide whether or not you meet each other’s criteria and whether or not it really feels right.
Here are the mistakes to avoid on Date 3:
Avoiding the deal breaker questions:
By Date 3, you’ve got to ask the tough questions about your “must haves”: Questions about addictions and bad habits, general health conditions, what family life looks like or could look like, where you see yourself in five years, and so on.
2) Having sex before commitment:
It can be tempting to have sex earlier than is best for you emotionally and psychologically.. Sometimes people do it thinking it will win the other person over, some people try it to “see” if they’re attracted or could become attracted. Some people just want to have sex. No judgment, but if you’re looking for your forever person, I suggest waiting ‘til after Date 3 and agreeing to monogamy before having sex. See the article ofn the steps to establishing monogamy.
3) Continuing if you aren’t into it:
Your last ethical chance to tell someone it’s not a match before you’ve wasted too much of their time or had sex and gotten attached is date three. It’s just not nice to continue on--avoiding being lonely, at the cost of you both finding your forever match. It just decompensates later and becomes way more heart-wrenching.
You’d be amazed how many divorcing couples state they knew early on they were not a match. Telling the truth about that–what a chance to save yourself heartache. Date 3 is your chance to get out with grace, if it’s not your person, end it. That’s what’s best for you both.
Love,
