Why Must I Swipe Swipe Swipe, Delete, Delete, Delete
My first answer is, dating is an honest job and you DO need to be willing to put in the work. Finding your soulmate does take time and a good attitude, like any other important accomplishment.
My second answer is: maybe you don’t have to work SO hard.
If you are having the experience of looking for a needle in a haystack you might be unconsciously making dating harder than it actually is.
It should be more like looking for a bunch of gummy bears in a haystack than 1 needle!
One member of Master the Art of Love asked me this question because she felt she was forced to waste time saying no to too many crappy prospects.
I don’t want my clients to get dating fatigue, so I told her the 3 keys to getting better candidates and moving more quickly through those that aren’t a match.
You must know exactly what you want.
You need a list of 5-7 practical things, 5-7 “heart” things and 5-7 things regarding chemistry and attraction. If it’s more than 7, you’re looking for a fantasy or some compensation for something, not a partner. ESSENTIALIZE!
2. You must prove you want THAT to the powers that be, by looking for it, imagining it and saying NO when someone is NOT IT.
Every day, I need you to imagine finding this person. This will make you biased towards looking up and flirting. Believing/faith is very attractive. And when someone clearly doesn’t fit your criteria or a DEALBREAKER is present, you must abort the mission.
3. You must counteract your fear. Fear, though natural, if succumbed to, is a dream killer.
The dating game requires mind management. When fear comes in, you need to replace it with imagining what you DO want and finding evidence that it exists. I developed group coaching to go with my dating course, because this requires support. Dating is a team sport!
Love,
