You Have Not Tried Everything!
I remember, while complaining about my relationship, telling my coach “I've tried everything!”
And by “everything,” I meant nagging, complaining, blaming, and trying to “be nice.” That was hardly everything I could do to improve my relationship. Saying you’ve tried everything is complete BS, and a cop out!
If you missed the Love-O-Meter quiz, I’ve linked it again. You can ask yourself, “how good am I at love,” and get an answer in about 2 minutes. If we’ve been struggling in a relationship for a while, we’ll usually discover we are no longer trying anything useful, even while we tell ourselves that we are. The quiz will give you lots of new ideas for things to try which have been proven to help relationships.
Even more important than getting back to the RIGHT ACTIONS is your attitude.
When you love something, you fight for it; you never stop trying and you KEEP iterating. Just as you would for your fitness, your health, your business, and your kids, this area is no different. Stop being offended that love requires the same passion and diligence.
It’s easy to think, based on the brainwashing of Disney and rom-com movies, that love is one of those areas you shouldn’t have to work on continuously to make great, as long as you find the right person. This just isn’t so! Instead of being the self-inflicted victim of a bad relationship, you can appoint yourself the one who makes it great (or leaves).
If you are someone who is earnest about being a good lover, and about being loved, you need support to literally rewire your brain and teach yourself a new set of theories. That’s why I created the Love-In Community. It’s a place to gather with like-minded people, who are fighting for their own dreams in life, debunking their own excuses, and cheering each other on in the area of LOVE.
For those of you who know you don’t have what you want, but you are not sure what you do want, tune in to next week’s newsletter, because we’re going to discuss how to articulate what you most want! It’s super luscious, and it’s not what you think.
